She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
