THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?