if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration