stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
