I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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