ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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