windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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