Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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