I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I need to calm my uterus...
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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