You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
grandma shit on top of the toilet
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
