The maid of honor just puked.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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