Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Randomize
