i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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