Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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