shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
