i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
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