We named our party play list daddy issues
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Randomize
