words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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