I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize