is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
