so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
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You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
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Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.