i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
