Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
