He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
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We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
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We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
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