Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
home. puking in laundry basket.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
