This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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