You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
