did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
