JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
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It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
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Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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