oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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