Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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