Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
