i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
