Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
what the fuck happened to the tacos
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
