If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
