i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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