This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
