Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
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