How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
