Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
