Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body