What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize