she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
