Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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