if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
