Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
