Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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