So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
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