2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
