Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
