Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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